Gone with the Crazy Housewives

Don't you dare! I can make no sense if I want!

The new year started a month ago, and again I have been quiet on the writing front. Certainly life has gotten busy (doesn’t it always?), yet I have somehow managed to find time to watch TV—and read, if you count web articles—but not to write. No, that’s not true. I tried going back to fiction writing, but apparently those creative muscles have completely atrophied. So, while I figure out if my psyche is ready to take on my fiction writer’s block and power through the painful writing to come, I thought it best to focus some of my writing efforts here.

And so, without further ado, some thoughts on my recent viewings: 

Turner Classic Movies—This has become an important channel in my life. Since I last wrote, I’ve watched at least 12 films, including Gaslight (1944), The Women (1939), and The Thing From Another World (1951). This past weekend, the boyfriend and I watched Gone with the Wind (1939). That’s roughly four hours of viewing. And although the film holds up thanks to stunning visuals and fantastic acting, it’s difficult not to get distracted by the soft portrayal of slavery. It especially hit me during a powerful scene in which hundreds of Confederate soldiers lie dying in the Atlanta streets. It’s a raw and realistic image of the painful nature of war...and yet there isn’t a single scene that comes close to giving this type of realistic portrayal of the brutality of slavery. The slaves in this story, whatever their situation, are only concerned about the health and happiness of their white owners...even after the South has fallen. Midway through the film, the boyfriend suggested that next time we can do a double feature of Gone with the Wind and 12 Years a Slave, just to balance things out. 

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills—This season is both boring and bizarre, and all of my past feelings about cast members have been turned upside down. Kyle is now the most reasonable one. Brandi has gone from charmingly truthful to selfish and mean. Yolanda is boring. Lisa is boring. Kim is solely on screen with (a) dogs, (b) kids, or (c) other former child stars. And new cast member Joyce is annoying but innocuous. But then there's Carlton. I don't believe we've witnessed this level of crazy in quite a while. Especially not from anyone sober. Carlton entered the Housewives world determined to hate Kyle. (We don't know why. Did producers suggest it? Is it like prison where you want to come in and immediately punch the biggest guy to establish your strength? We'll never know.) She was pretty consistent in her random dislike of Kyle through several episodes. But then, for a split second at her stripper-themed party, she thought she might be wrong about Kyle because Kyle was nice to her and gave her a necklace. (You could see the change of feeling was unsettling to her. It’s the same look the daughter gives me when I make any suggestions.) Then that night Carlton dreamed that Kyle had been “talking shit” behind her back. And...that was enough for her to decide she had been right about Kyle all along. (Yes, you read that right.) Her non-Housewives friends apparently confirmed that Kyle said something at the party about disliking the smelly bathroom. (Bravo showed footage of Kyle and Joyce grossed out because someone hadn’t flushed. Apparently she was talking shit.) Now Carlton feels better because she can continue to hate Kyle and misinterpret everything in a way that makes that possible. My question is this: If my brain has to work this hard to make sense of a reality show, am I choosing the right show?

Next time I will confess to watching a reality show that even I’m embarrassed about—and yet somehow I still watch it.